What's Wrong With America: 2004 Radio Music Awards (October 27, 2004)

Artist of the Year Hip Hop/Rhythmic Radio -- USHER. Boring!

Artist of the Year Top 40 Radio -- BEYONCE. Boring but sexy.

Artist of the Year Country Radio -- TIM McGRAW. OK with me.

Song of the Year Rock Alternative Radio -- LINKIN PARK "Numb". Garbage!

Song of the Year Hip-Hop/Rhythmic Radio -- USHER "Yeah!". Yecch!

Artist of the Year Rock Radio -- LINKIN PARK. Garbage!

Artist of the Year Modern Adult -- TRAIN. Too mellow.

Legend Award -- JANET JACKSON. What did she do to deserve that? (evil wink)

Cingular Artist of the Year -- USHER. Can someone get into the radio biz and ... usher ... in some better pop music?

Here's what else Radio Music Awards should have awarded.

Artist of the Year Comedy Radio -- WORM QUARTET (congratulations to WQ lead Tim Crist, aka Shoebox, and his wife Kim had Stephen James Crist on October 23rd, 2004 @ 9:46 pm, weighing 10 lbs., 3.3 oz.(yikes!) 21 3/4 inches. Worm Quartet currently has one of the top comedy songs of the year 2004 with "Great Idea for a Song."

Artist of the Year Dance Radio -- SHAPESHIFTER. I can't get "Lola's Theme" out of my head. Does commercial radio ever play this cool song?

Song of the Year Comedy Radio -- TONY GOLDMARK "Sirius Black." This novelty song about a character from "Harry Potter" is in the running for the best song of 2004.

Song of the Year Dance Radio -- GEORGE MICHAEL "Amazing." He's back from a long abscence. Too bad local radio never played this song.

Artist of the Year Folk Radio -- CARLA ULBRICH. Few people can pronounce her name, but her song "If I Had the Copyright (The F-word Song)" was making so many waves her song appearred on XM Radio (XM 150 and 151) outside of the Best of Dr. Demento (on XM 40 and 151).

Song of the Year Folk Radio -- HENRY PHILLIPS "Gotta Get a Girlfriend." Still unreleased but getting a lot of airplay on dfsxradio.com.

The Real Legend Award (25 years of fame or more) -- WEIRD AL YANKOVIC. His first big hit, "My Bologna", hit #1 on the Dr. Demento Show 25 years ago in November 1979, and he's been putting out parodies ever since.

DJ Keeps 'Richard Nixon' from Top of UK Charts (October 27, 2004)

This is one of my favorite songs of the day, and guess what, I can't hear it on Channel, Star, Z, 91X, 94/9, My, or even Magic.

Swedish DJ Eric Prydz held on at the top of the U.K. pop singles chart on Sunday with "Call on Me," a remix of Steve Winwood's 1982 hit "Valerie."

Manic Street Preachers debuted at No. 2 with "The Love of Richard Nixon," denying the Welsh band its third chart-topper in a 15-year career.

There was a familiar sound to the new entry at No. 7, where Depeche Mode celebrated nearly a quarter of a century in the business with "Enjoy the Silence 04," a remix of the synth-pop band's earlier hit of the same name.

Darius, a Scotsman not born 25 years ago, had to make do with a No. 8 start for his new entry "Kinda Love," leaving Deep Dish's "Flashdance" to round out the top 10, down four places.

This is what American radio is missing. Dance music. Look into it.