Day 13: Pumping on Humpday (March 29, 2006, Aqua 5, 2010)

With one day left until Mindy Aid, the realm-wide benefit concert taking place over some hundred musical venues, many local musical acts, as well as comedians, actors, and other entertainers, have signed up to play tomorrow. With a pledge total of $864,236 as of Wednesday morning at 5am, the folks in El Zona are going to really pump things up because time is running out to raise the impossible $10,000,000 to the boss of the castle so Mindy can be released back to her adoptive mather, Wendy.

Albert and Hoss have finally perfected the computer card invention with a testing of the card on Hoss's comedy music database. We'll tell you more about it on Friday.

Meanwhile, every TV and radio station has apparently dropped their regular scheduled programming to cover the El Zona Thon, making the special in effect getting a hundred share of the viewing and listening audience. During the day, the local kids show hosts took turns during the day (school resumes on Monday) entertaining the children and getting them to ask their parents to donate to the Mindy fund.

Back at the castle, Brian Schmuck is waiting until Friday at 5pm when the $10,000,000 is raised and all of the radio stations will be force-fed his Brian Radio brand of pop music formats: CHR, smooth jazz, contemporary country, top 40 oldies, adult contemporary, contemporary alternative rock, soft urban, chick contemporary, teen pop, and soft standards, all formats nobody in El Zona likes to hear. Russell and the boss fine-tune Brian's computer system so that the computer can just enter the music databases without sending any trojan viruses by e-mail. Mindy, locked in the top floor, ditches the boys clothes and puts on the long pink dress that Russell dropped off. She prays that she will be rescued instead of being given back to Carl after tomorrow.

Some ideas to get people to donate to the Minday fund have been launched. Many car dealers are giving buyers free season tickets to the San Rubio Seals baseball team when they purchase a car and donate $1,000 to the Mindy fund. Several toll roads are now taking Mindy fund donations. Indian gaming casinos are also giving the Mindy fund a cut of the winnings by a casino player. The men in the realm's prisons are donating $1 for every time one of them says an expletetive, which quickly added to a lot of money by the end of the day.

During the telethon, many local businesses were giving updates on their fund raising efforts while the announcers told religious protesters that they are no better than anybody in El Zona if they don't shut up and donate to the Mindy fund.

D.T. books several big name imitation acts to play at the big venues at stadiums, arenas, and ampitheatres.

At the diner in Foolian, Carl steals more money from the Mindy fund by the cash register so he could purchase some boy's clothes, scissors, handcuffs, fake glasses with moustache, and other stuff.

Chachi and Angelina are greeted by Santo Pedro in the KSEBQ studio and he plans to liquidate some of his un-given toys from Equimas last week and give the money to the Mindy fund.

Wendy and Jennifer arrive at the KSEBQ studio to plead to the viewers and listeners that their daughter needs to be returned by donating as much money as possible.

By 5pm that evening, the tally stood at $2,163,325, with 48 hours left to raise $10,000,000.

Scotty arrives at the studio and has an idea for a rally, where people donate, and the one who gives the most gets his autographed baseball bat of Seal legend Tony Win. That helped boost it up by over $15,000.

That evening, Alyssa and Carlotta took an evening shift from 6-10pm and a courier gram from the boss of the castle had these words for them: "If you value Wendy's life, you'll give me the $10,000,000 by Friday at 5pm." That energized the phone callers and the rate of donations started to pick up more.

Back at the castle, Russell lets Mindy out to eat and to do her call to mother nature. Russell tells Mindy that she looks cute and pretty. Mindy doesn't say a word except that she doesn't want to see her estranged dad Carl ever again.

At 10pm, it was time to get really nasty at the telethon. Anybody could enter the studio and tell a dirty joke even using expletetives in exchange for a $100 donation. The line lasted for hours as, this being an annual joke telling day, people took turns handing out $100 and telling the dirtiest joke that they know.

Riddle: Why did Snow Plight get fired from Dizzyland? She was caught sitting on Peniocchio's nose saying "Lie. Lie!"

Joke: Two ladies were sitting in a test movie theater reviewing the latest movie to see if people want to see it on TV for free, when one lady says to the other, "Samantha? The man next to me is playing with himself." Samantha tells the other lady, "Kelly, that's none of your business." And the lady says to her, "It is so. He's using my hand!"

Riddle: Why did the chicken cross the road? So he can s--t on the other side!

And the dirty jokes continued on from 10pm-5am the next morning, with a rate of some $200 a minute being donated to the Mindy fund.

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