Day 7: Talking About Mindy (March 23, 2006, Blue 29, 2009)

Two days after Equimas Day is a day that is sort of like Boxing Day in Canada.

This is Exchange Day, the day where people exchange Equimas gifts with other people at work. Since it falls on a Thursday this year, it won't be necessary to celebrate it the day before (if it falls on a Saturday) or the day after (if it falls on a Sunday).

There are also creatues that never celebrate Christmas because they're either hibernating or it's just too g--damn cold to travel in December. So, in late March, with Spring now underway to thaw out the winter snow, such people can now travel to other cities to celebrate a belated Christmas with their folks where they would exchange gifts. This date is on the first Thursday of the Vernalmas holiday season.

Wendy and Jennifer, the couple who adopted t-girl Mindy, appearred on several local TV news programs pleading with the public to forward any information about their abducted t-daughter to the authorities listed on a phone number superimposed on the screen. The couple held a public candlelight vigil later that evening where hundreds of visitors participated, singing hymns, and praying to Xanna, the goddess of the eternal rainbow color spectrum, as part of their organized uncopyrighted (very important that it's in the public domain or I can't mention it here) religion they call Venarius. I'm not sure where they got the name from.

Anyway, Hoss and his computer detective crew find the origin of hte trojan horse virus in the e-mail sent by somebody from last week. They manage to fish it out from the hard drive, isolate the e-mail, and archive it onto a CD-R. They try to call Albert about it, but Albert's voice mail was fouled up with Brian Radio replacing Albert's message with probably one of the worst pop songs ever: Alicia Keys' "Fallin'". Hoss hangs up the phone in disgust immediately upon hearing this piece of s--t tune.

Albert and his cloned lab crew used a test ROM burn-in program burnt onto a computer card to test out their new invention. The computer card took up one vacant slot for a personal computer. They test out the card that acted as a read-only drive with programs and files burnt into it, but it crashed Windows XP. Back to the drawing board.

Scotty and D.T. reenter the San Diego Outland realm where they go to D.T.'s house, grab D.T.'s backup copies of his comedy music collection, head over to Scotty's friend Allen Wayne in the nearby hills, and spent the day making multiple copies of D.T.'s 20,000 comedy and novelty songs spread across 100 CD-Rs.

Chachi and the Little Merbabe went on a date to see the last night of Equimas on the Prado. While there, they saw a stand advertising a petition drive to change the name of the month-long event to Blue Nights, which sounded depressing, but in El Zona, Blue is the name of the 12th month of the year, so there's a double meaning to the name. Chachi went over to the boothman to complain about their drive to replace Equimas with something politically correct such as a name of the month. The boothman said that the name Blue Nights would represent more people including those who don't celebrate Equimas. Chachi said that it was ridiculous and that Equimas is a non-denominational major holiday that is celebrated by everybody. The boothman told them to stick it where the sun don't shine. Chachi said that if he gets away with it, then he'll start a drive that will reverse the decision and have a boycott the Blue Nights website set up. The boothman gave Chachi the finger and told him to go f--k himself. Chachi took out his bullhorn and blasted to the public that this boothman was planning to destroy Equimas by replacing it with Blue Nights. The audience in shock came forward towards the boothman and threatened to beat him up. The boothman took the petition drive from the booth, but before he could get away, a couple of beefy gay men grabbed him and threatened to make love to him if he didn't give up the drive. The boothman threw the petition away. The beefy gay men let him go. The boothman ran away as fast as he could. Looks like next year there will still be an Equimas on the Prado instead of Blue Nights. Isn't this what December Nights in San Diego means? Blue Nights since it doesn't mention Christmas? December Nights doesn't mean s--t to me!

Lenny almost self-implodes when Brian Radio broadcasting over the city's intercoms malfunctions, getting stuck on a few seconds of a Lindsay Lohan hack pop tune.

Alyssa and Carlotta get a new job. They're radio talk show hosts. A radio station, fed up with a Brian Radio Yanni Standards format playing since last Friday decided to ditch Brian and reformat it into an FM talk format called "Girls Gone Chatty" featuring all chick talkers. Alyssa and Carlotta could pass in looks alone, but do they have enough to sustain a daily talk show for three hours a day for five days a week?

Record stores in El Zona report sharp declines in CD sales because Brian Radio CHR and Top 40 Hits replaced airplay of all of the other independent musical genres and selections. The big four record label acts getting mostly exclusive airplay are causing people to think that the music that they like isn't being made anymore, so why bother to visit a record store if all they carry is what's on Brian Radio?

Radio talk show hosts are a growing broadcasting field, with all talk staitons replacing a Brian Radio format here and there in El Zona to try to stem to exodus of radio listeners who feel that there's no music for them to listen to on the radio anymore.

Getting back to the Mindy abduction, radio talk show hosts and their callers are going bonkers with the subject of the abduction of Mindy, with many callers telling them about Mindy's life and some thinking that the escape of Carl from prison is related to the abduction of Mindy (which nobody saw for sure). Talk show host Rick Sloberts set up a prevent child abduction page on his website telling readers how to protect their children from predators. Another talk show host, Roger Hedgehog, fields in calls from teachers and classmates of Mindy as well as interviewing child protective officials and policemen. Stacy Slayer on another station takes calls from imprisioned child abducters and murderers on his radio show. Morning show hosts, Leff and Ler, Gagger and Krisco, AK's Hayhouse, Unique and the Man, Bob, Shirley, and Seesaw, the Muckey Show, Cross Cansnore, just about every talker in town was talking about the subject of Mindy.

Getting back to Mindy in the castle. When we last saw her, she was just about to enter the first floor from the stairwell a mysterious hand grasps her shoulder and gags her mouth with a rag soaked with some chemical until she passes out. She is taken away from the stairwell. Who was the person?

Mindy is awaken and she discovers that she is strapped onto a chair. The person who took her from the stairwell, named Russell, is one of the assistants who are helping his boss achieve a goal. Mindy asks Russell what his goal is. Russell tells her that he saw her picture on the TV and that she is worth a lot of money to him and his boss. Mindy asks who the boss is. Russell says that is none of her business. The boss calls Russell on his cellphone, telling him to meet up with the boss. Russell exits the room where Mindy is imprisoned on a chair. Russell and the mysterious boss discuss what to do in terms of how much money to extort from the El Zona area in order to return Mindy to her parents.

Just outside the castle, Carl peeks through one of the windows and sees Mindy tied to a chair. On the the opposite end of the castle, the four butch lesbians have selected a spot to ring in the new year the day before and have been busy clearing out the brush to set up a remote-controlled fireworks display for the next evening. They fail to notice Carl on the opposite end and have no clue about the abduction of Mindy, who was inside the castle.

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