Today is the traditional After Equimas Day rush for many department stores who knock down the price of decorations, wrapping paper, and other holiday stuff by 50 percent. Since the temperature is down to 15 degrees above zero, it's the coldest After Equimas sale ever, and with that cold, very few hardcore bargain hunters bothered to wait outside for the mandatory earliest start of 8am opening bell, choosing instead to stay inside their heated automobiles gulping down $2.95 a gallon gasoline to run the engine. The shopping crowds were sparse, traffic accidents were high due to slippery roads, pedestrians were injured by cars without law-mandated tire chains, and the police and emergency crews were stretched thin, the thinnest since the 9/11 incident.
Meanwhile, D.T., Scotty, Chachi, Hoss, Albert, and Beverly took their own transportation means to the Realm Security Bureau World Headquarters near Montpythomery Field. At the 9am meeting inside the covered secret ampitheater down in one of the basement levels, commissioner Robert Aquarius invites the gang over to near his podium as he addresses the RSB agents.
Robert: Agents. We have a major problem you are all aware of. Mikkos Disneycox is demanding to own every media outlet in the El Zona region and is using some kind of weather control machine he built to intimidate the King of El Zona to change the region charter. He wants to take complete ownership of the cable systems and permanently jam all of the DirecTV and Dish Network satellite TV signals so that his cable system would have a monopoly as a choice for cable programming in El Zona. He also wants to own all of the gasoline outlets, forcing the O&O's to also give up ownership of the pumps. He wants to own the gas and electric utility networks so he can profit from the money. He wants to own all of the TV and radio stations in town so his views will be the only ones that are seen. In short, he wants to take over you and become the dictator of El Zona with the help of his weather machine.
Robert: Professor Albert Edison and his wife, Dr. Beverly "Bones" McCoy, by my side, had their expensive diamond Ice Bush stolen from their residence on early Equimas Day. Soon after, the weather temperature dropped several dozen degrees and a heavy snow fall due to the already high humidity in the sky blanketed the whole region, putting the city on ice. We don't know yet if the Ice Bush has anything to do with Mikkos or his weather machine.
Robert: I have asked the President of the State of America to mobilize our Armed Forces to assist our agents in our quest to defeat this potential destroyer of our county economy, Mikkos Disneycox. In the meantime, I ordered our county militia chapters to mobilize and help us find the whereabouts of Disneycox and his weather machine.
Robert: There are many decoy signals being transmitted from various areas of the county. Your goal is to identify the decoy signals and turn them off, one by one, by whatever means possible, leaving fewer decoys to beam the signal, eventually, helping us narrow it down to the one outbound signal of Mikkos' media transmissions that will lead back to his whereabouts, and possibly, his weather machine.
Robert: This is a dangerous mission for all of you because of the freezing temperatures that could literally freeze you to death, so be prepared to deal with the cold as you carry out your mission. Our entire El Zona population depends on you, the agents, and our militia. Albert, D.T., and the rest of you. I want you to follow me to my quarters. The rest of you in the amphitheater. Good luck and God bless.
Robert stops addressing the assembly as the agents disperse to carry out the mission to locate and shut down the decoy signals the next time Mikkos jams the airwaves with his daily state of the county address. The gang follow Robert to his quarters.
Robert asks Albert what is it about the Ice Bush that could literally stop traffic cold as the auctioneer claimed. Albert says that its possible that the way the diamonds in the Ice Bush could cause some kind of atomic reaction that could aid another scientific contraption such as a weather machine, but nobody has proven that it was possible.
Scotty says that its possible that with the color spectrums revealed as some kind of light is shined on the bush, it can cause some kind of photogenetic reaction in the bandwidth of light spectrum that could trigger certain reactions of something to occur.
Whatever the theory, the point is that the Ice Bush is likely a catalyst, and the weather machine must be located and shut down once the location is pinpointed.
At noon, Mikkos Disneycox signed on with his daily state of the county address.
Mikkos on TV: Good After Equimas, citizens. This is the new King of El Zona, who has already recalled Day Grayvis without any ballot as I have now taken over the ruling of the zone. Day Grayvis has still not indicated that he will order the owners of the media outlets, utilites, gasoline pumps, and the food markets to relinquish the ownerships to me in exchange for returning the temperature back down to normal.
Robert: Quick, Albert, call Mikkos on your cell phone. I got his phone number from Day Grayvis. Have a word with him.
Albert dials up Mikkos.
Mikkos on TV: Excuse me, I have a telephone ringing. (picks up the phone) Hello, Dufus?
Albert: It's Professor Albert Edison.
Mikkos on TV: Holy s--t! (he said the full word on TV, we censored it out here) It's my good old mentor and teacher, Albert Edison.
Albert: Don't sweet talk me. You were a bad student, threatening to take over the Harwars College campus with your life-size volcano project if I didn't give you an A+ for your grade in my class.
Mikkos on TV: now, now, Professor, calm down. I am successful with my weather machine now, thanks to you, and your Ice Bush that my henchmen stole from you.
Albert: How did you know that my Ice Bush would work in your machine?
Mikkos on TV: correction...MY Ice Bush now. I own it. You were a bad teacher and I had to take something of yours for the benefit of me because the F grade you gave me cost me the friendships of several colleagues. You forced my hand to get back at you and the community who shunned me over the past 50 years of my life.
Albert: What the hell? Are you using your weather machine to get back at your school bullies?
Mikkos on TV: Yes, and they will pay for all of the years they've been picking on me all through school, starting with El Zona, and working my way all across the State of America nation as not only my bullies give me back my lunch money they took from me when I was a kid, but they will be paying it back over 1,000,000 times for the rest of their lives through the high cost of utilities, food, and media.
Albert: You are so demented. That was the reason why you started this cold machine?
Mikkos on TV: Yes. I can turn any city in the world cold on ice with my machine, thanks to your Ice Bush and your skimpy College's idea of a science and technology education.
Albert: Listen, Mikkos, this isn't worth it. The Armed Forces will be tracking you down and will get you.
Mikkos on TV: Oh no, they won't find me. I have al-Queda spies helping me out and they will kill anyone who messes with my decoy signals that help me hide my real signal so nobody can track me down. They also have suicide airplanes to make a point that I am serious about my mission.
Albert: Do you plan to pay al-Queda for your dastardly wish to take over all of the people in this nation?
Mikkos on TV: It will be far considerably more than what China is currently paying their workers.
Albert: OK. Now, if these demands are met, do I get my Ice Bush back?
Mikkos on TV: Never again. You can be rest assurred that it will be in a safe place, with me.
Albert: F--k you, Mikkos! (hangs up)
Mikkos on TV: Now now, there's no need to have a hissy fit over several cute shiny diamonds, is there? Very well. I'll turn down the temperature to 5 degrees above zero. I will return tomorrow and hopefully, Day Grayfis, the desposed King of El Zona, will call me and help me change the charter to allow me to own the utilities, food, and media companies, and Day will get back his other King powers and a return to normal temperatures. This is Mikkos...out.
D.T.: Hey, he stole that tag from Ryan Seacrest!
Chachi: Don't tell me he listens to that top 40 countdown show on Sundays. No wonder he's warped. Top 40 music of today is so low-mentality nowadays.
Scotty: Hey, I have a few of my fellow agents contact me, saying that there are signals coming into El Zona westerly from the Ocean Peach pier, the Point Lima point, and the Del Martian fairgrounds.
Hoss: One agent says that there's a signal coming into the Dogalina Islands from the south.
D.T.: You think he's broadcasting from an island in the Specific Ocean?
Robert: Good call, deputies. It's possible that he's originating from an island in the Specific Ocean, but it's also possible that it's yet another decoy retransmitter.
D.T.: Did anyone time the difference between the time Albert spoke here and the time we heard his voice on TV?
Robert: Depending on how many miles the TV signal traveled from his place back to El Zona, and the fact that the cell phone has to use microwaves to get Albert's speech over to Mikkos, that could help us determine the location of his origin. We need our agents to intercept all of the signals and take a complete synchronized time diary on the exact point Mikkos says a certain word. The earlier the transmission, the closer we are to finding his location.
Agent Scally: I have clocked in the time difference between the time you spoke and the time your signal reached Mikkos. His phone number is a local one, so it's likely that it goes to either his place or a relay that forwards Albert's call to his place.
Scotty: Do you think that al-Queda's phone calls from Mikkos can lead us to his whereabouts?
D.T.: If we can manage to infiltrate one of the teams, and wait it out until Mikkos calls them with their orders, we can trace the signal collectively back to his origination.
Chachi: That's dangerous, but it can be done.
Robert: Well, I'll talk to my security adviser, Sean Moore, a former agent, and he'll advise our agents on our plan. Good thinking, fellows.
D.T.: Thanks, commissioner.
Well, whatever the RSB plans are, they better pinpoint the weather machine fast or soon, the whole city will be like a huge freezer, putting a complete strain on the electric grid, the natural gas lines, the gasoline and food supplies, and the media outlets who are having problems reporting the news because of too many catastrophies happening all at once. Meanwhile, the After Equimas Day sale picks up and people arrive in heated buses while the store managers bring the 50 percent off holiday stuff directly to the buses where the passengers buy them on the spot. All were sold out by evening.
Meanwhile, back in the real San Diego realm, CHP officers are strategically staked out on several freeway hiding spots, waiting for David Tanny in his Torino to drive on one of the freeways, and to arrest him on the spot for evading the CHP last Friday.
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