What's My Beef!

Case in point: February. Yes, the month where people think February is prononced the same way as January. That is...Jan-U-ary? Feb-U-ary. WRONG!

Whimsical Will, http://www.whimsicalwill.com who does the weekly Demented News segments on the syndicated Dr. Demento Show (no station in L.A. or S.D. as I write this, but hopefully that will change soon or the radio programmers at Clear Channel will remain brainless as they have ben) reported in his DN about the mispronounciation of the month of February.

In the song "America Pie" by Don McLean, he sings the lyrics "Feb-U-ary makes me quiver...". I noticed also this month that several radio personalities has also been skipping the "r" in enounciating the syllables of the month of Fe-BRU-ary.

In 199, the Fox announcer mispronounces February Thrills as Feb-U-ary Thrills. Alyssa Milano on the WB series "Charmed" also flubbed the month also, missing the "r"! Shame!

Remember, there is a "brew" in Fe-BRU-ary, not in Feb-U-ary. Got that deejays?

And you wonder how anyone didn't mispronounce January as Jan-RU-ary!

Kristi Knight-Jagger of Star 100.7 also misprounced the month during her late afternoon traffic report, completely missing the "r" in Feb-RU-ary as it should be pronounced.

Kristi Knight e-mailed me and she took a poll of about ten people to say the month that comes after January.

They all pronounced it Feb-U-ary. "I don't recall anyone pronouncing the R. In a inpromptu poll we took around the office it was agreed the R is silent. At least we all spell it correctly." says Knight

One thing about Feb-U-ary, it comes after Jan-RU-ary.

A recent car dealership ad also had an enthusiastic announcer blowing the month altogether as he mispronounced the month three times in the 60-second spot! Ouch!

The Jammin' Z-90 announcer who does the taped contest plugs fumbled when he announced several station-sponsored events taking place this month in Feb-U-ary!

Macy's department stores just can't get it right. It's touting its Feb-U-ary sale three times per spot this weekend!

But the enounciation shame award of the week goes to Regis Philbin! On his TV shows, he keeps up the mispronounciation parade by fumbling the pronounciation of the month of Feb-RU-ary like Feb-U-ary!

Now Regis wants to get paid more money to $250,000 per show, up from $100,000! Hey Reege, you better brush up on your Feb-RU-ary pronounciation skills before you deserve a raise!

Robin Roth of 91X mispronounced the month of Fe-BRU-ary as Feb-U-ary several times this past month.

Oh, what the hell is this world coming to if these people on TV and radio cannot get their enounciations correct? Are these Schoolhouse Rock flunkies ever going to be taken' seriously by mangling the English words by omitting the needed consonants such as the second month of the year? Good grief!

What's My Beef: Make Olympic Players Go For Million Dollars!

Anything where the players are rated arbitrarily by a panel is not a sport. It's more akin to the kind of scoring seen on The Gong Show.

What's all this fuss about Russians threating to quit the games and that Canadian couple who's been seen everywhere on whatever media I happen to catch? I didn't see any of the Olympics due to my busy schedule, but now you can see why I don't bother with the Olympics anymore.

One way to fix sports like those where people are judged by voting panels, who may be bribed into voting favorably for one player over the other, is to simply get rid of the judges! Replace them with a scoring system and have the players perform the required number of stunts in the shortest amount of time. The sports affected would include skating and skiing, as well as any sport where judges can be replaced by a legimate set of rules to follow to get the highest score. The player who scores the most points after the competetion wins!

Wins what? Gold? Silver? Bronze? Win the gold for the country? What's in it for the players? Unemployment? Merchandising deals? Tabloid articles? Nah! How about letting all of the Olympic players play for something they can make liquid and use immediately...

MONEY!

Let the players go for the bucks instead of the gold! This will give the Olympics a much-needed boost in interest if we have curlers, bobsledders, slalom skiiers, figure skaters, and ice hockey players go for the top purse of the equilvalent of the U.S. currency of $1,000,000 translated into whatever currency of the country they represent.

In case of scoring ties, put the players in The Weakest Link and have the players vote each other off until one remains with the top prize!

Time to fix the Olympics! After all, it's money that is the driving force of competetion nowadays!

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